Saturday, March 04, 2006

Education in the new millenium

I've heard the select bits and pieces of the Jay Bennish rant that fall through the media filter, as you probably have too. Michelle's posted the entire transcript of the tirade, though - and all I can say is wow. I had no idea how much more there is to geography today - state of the union speeches had nothing to do with it when I was a kid. My favorite bit has to be the part where he confuses George Clinton with Bill Clinton. Empowering the minds of tomorrow on union-extorted wages - yeeeaaaghhh! We're so screwed.

I don't have any little carpet sharks exposed to this daily that I can grill at the end of the day, but I imagine what the experience must be like nowadays. I picture greeting a young daughter something like this -

Heya, kiddo! Whadja learn in math today?

To speak truth to the fascist McHegemonyburton!

Uh... that's nice. What about History?

That we have no right to impose democracy, our culture, and beliefs on far away people with bombs!

So you're done with WWII, I guess. You ended that sentence with a preposition - do you mean not to impose on 'people with bombs', or not to 'impose with bombs'?

We're not supposed to ask. It's racist.

Right, sorry. And spelling?

I-M-P-E-A-C-H-M-E-

OK, that'll do. Why don't you go ask mom for a snack? And tell her what you did in gym class, I probably shouldn't hear it.

Keep your morality off my body! Can I have some brutally harvested imperialist capital gains for the field trip tomorrow?

Not unless everyone else is getting some too. That would be an unjust and oppressive distribution of wealth that subjugates you to the patriarchal agenda.

2 Comments:

Blogger andy said...

Doug, Thomas Sowell writes very good commentaries. When I read this I remembered your parody, and thought you might like to read this

I am at this time reading Mr. Sowell’s book Black Rednecks and White Liberals. Not bad, but not as good as most of his columns.

9:44 PM  
Blogger Doug said...

Sowell isn't a regular read for me, but I almost never regret it when I do read him. No exception here, thanks for the link.

12:53 AM  

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