Or Make me an offer

Have I got a deal for Harry Belafonte! He won't get one better in the 21st century. Lemme pitch it: Harry, if you'll just stop trying to think, I'll stop trying to sing Calypso. Sound complicated? Not so! Steel drums will not coax one more syllable from me - not Limbo Rock, not Angelina, not even the Banana Boat Song, if for your part, whenever 12 random neurons fire you'll just keep mum. Heck, as an added bonus I'll even give up trying to Merengue solo. And in return, you'll never be exposed to something like this:

Jump in the line, rock your body in time, ok, I believe you!
Jump in the line, rock your body in time, ok, I believe you!

Well, not from me you won't, and believe me, that's worth the price of admission. Quick question, Harry - if Colin Powell sold out his race, how come you're the one who seems to keep cashing in on it?

I'd like to get a Friday Frickin' Cat Blogging post in on Friday for a change, and with a dearth of Friday left that means I need to cut it short, otherwise, I'd tell you about a guy who went to jail for failing to follow through on a contract hit. The usual prandial pussy cats seem to have disturbed a commenter over at Six Meat Buffet (actually, I think he was already disturbed when we found him, but I have no liability insurance), so it's a change of pace this time around in deference to the collywobbles of spunky little Spike.

Burn a little bit o' weekend

So, what's happened of note lately? Well, of course there's the bin Laden tape. Its appearance confirms that an unsettling proportion of my countrymen don't yet seem to have twigged to the fact that he's only a head of the hydra; they're still fixated on him as if he's the end game in the entire war on terror. Sure, it'd be great to take him down, but it isn't going to solve anything - and if we take him alive, I expect that it will be a briefly galvanizing event in the tango world. Of the masses who admire him — but thus far not enough to start blowing kuffir to smithereens — I imagine that quite a few will hit their tipping point. But then, I gather that we can't tie our shoes in the morning without "creating more terrorists", so perhaps that's just par for the course. As for the contents of the tape itself though, I have nothing to add to the discussion, except to point out that I don't think it's yet been adequately explained why it sounds like Osama and Jim McDermott share a speech writer.

A couple years ago, the MSM seemed to all of a sudden remember that children are victimized in all sorts of ways, and cable news channels became 24/7 abuse and abduction coverage. After briefly fixating on the fact that bad things can happen to people who vacation out of the country, it now seems to be fascinated by the recollection that mines are dangerous places. Someone help me out - what do they get paid for again? Pay me instead, I can do their job - "Water still wet! Film at 11:00." Well, ok, I'm not being completely accurate, here - the way I tell it, you'd think they'd be interested in nine miners trapped by flooding, but that would be neglecting to note that there's no Bush administration angle to that story. Or at least that adding one would require spin of positively European proportions.

Democrats do say the darnedest things. It looks like at least a couple decided to celebrate MLK Day in unexceptional fashion - that is, judging people by the color of their skin rather than the content of their character. I was going to make the snarky observation that celebrating a special day should involve some sort of change in one's routine, but I guess it goes to show that they don't just preach it, they live it.

Largely unexplored is the deputy director of the Democratic Governors Association's assertion that "Jim Crow Sr. is dead. Jim Crow Jr. is alive and well," but Ray Nagin has cemented his political and ideological position as the black Howard Dean, and Hillary has demonstrated unequivocally (yet again) that there's a double standard in racial media coverage. Trent Lott was run out on a rail for much less, and as long as Democrats continue speaking faster than they think, no one will be permitted to forget it any time soon. Vive la difference.

Speaking of which, there's always France (it's so damnably eternal); France is spreading peace and love and joy like wildfire. When it isn't making routinely unambiguous threats to nuke unspecified people with weapons it broke treaties to develop, or provoking rioting insurgents (why do they have so many problems with "youths"? Generation gap in Old Europe?) in a country that they illegally and unilaterally attacked and invaded without the approval and support of the world (and where u.n. peacekeepers did what they do best), it's actively undermining efforts to prevent terror-supporting states from acquiring nukes by alleviating any semblance of pressure that might result from bad behavior. Being France, in other words.

I suppose that Syria can't do it alone, so France is just pitching in, but when Iran already has the chocolate summit by the shorthairs, perhaps that's overkill. Well, at least the EU3 have finally shown us cowboys that flaccid soft power really can produce results in this crazy, multilateral worl- wait a minute! Russia is neither flaccid nor one of the EU3, is it? How peculiar. Quick note to Iran - threats to "end all voluntary cooperation" are predictably more effective if there's actually some kind of cooperation to end. I'm just sayin'.

And I've said enough for now. If you've still got a little time to kill, head over to Mutters and Musings to check out an interesting idea on immigration/emigrationon that Phil's posted. Before you do though, get you a widdle bit o' wuvvy-dovey kitty-witty! Friday Frickin' Cat Blogging! I've got a real soft spot for this one.

Who's my fuzzy muffin bean? Oh yes you are!

I Still Have a Scream

The fusion of Howard Dean meltdown and classic Loony Toons that I entitled "Howard 'The Duck' Dean - I Have a Scream", formerly hosted by Gordon of the now-defunct Cranky Neocon (now of Six Meat Buffet), was left hostless in the lurch. I revealed this to Jeremy of the dormant American Warmonger, who proceded to light a match under me to get new hosting for it. Noting that I was flame retardant, he evidenced no disappointment as he broke out the MAPP gas on my ass and made me get new hosting for it. If you hadn't seen it before, or had been looking for it but couldn't find it, thank or blame Jeremy for all but doing it for me (and, in fact, overcoming my inertia by actually doing part of it).

The Gnutella magnet link remains unchanged, and here's the new FileFront link. You'll still need to have the DIVX codec for Windows or OS/X installed in order to view it.